Saturday, April 17, 2010

The way home from Dubai






Dubai

April 9, 2010

The call to prayer is happening for the second time since we arrived from Ethiopia.

Do not leave the Dubai airport, unless you want to see Dubai, as you cannot re-enter until 3 or 4 hours before your flight, and the flight is at least 6 or 7 hours after the Dubai flight from Addis. You can, of course leave, and take a cab and dump your bags at a hotel outside of the airport, but we didnt do that on the way, and....thus we were a bit out of the loop. And you only have to leave the airport if you check your bags halfway for pickup in Dubai….the whole thing a pain the in the neck. We gave up after we figured it all out, 2 hours in, and waited around. Whatever.

If you like to shop, there is a lovely mall in the airport.

YES, this day does suck.

We said goodbye to Lulu-B yesterday at Toukoul. And to Ethiopia this morning. I cant believe we cant bring her home yet, even though I knew that was the story. No, orphanages are not a solution that truly benefits children, just as foster care is not a great solution either. I have read lots of criticisms of international adoption of late. Please, feel free to visit an orphanage, even as well run as Toukoul, and then lets talk. On that topic, just read in the NY Times about a new study on aging out of foster care in the US…guess what? Not a great way to start life either.


We were surprised to find that many of the children at Toukoul do not get adopted. It really is an orphanage, and some of the children get adopted, most through a French agency and a few through two US agencies. Many, many of the children stay and move through their various stages, even going into training programs as they get older, to try and help them prepare for work. One caretaker said they never know which children are going to be adopted and which will be there forever.

We went on a tour of the new orphanage, which is outside of Addis, near a town called Akaki . It is owned by Toukoul. The children from Toukoul 3 were just moved there, next children from Toukoul 2 and Toukoul 1 will be moved in. It will house many of the babies that are being adopted as well as children 0-5 years of age, with a special section for HIV positive children, some of whom will re-test HIV negative, after months of medication, which the director told me they felt is a huge success. It is a fairly open, airy space and will have a guest house a few minutes drive away, which is under construction. The whole thing will be very nice, and already has a classroom, a library, a toy room, and way the ratios like a typical daycare.

As wonderful as it is, it is still not a family; is still not a Reggio Emilia Preschool, a Montessori Preschool or even a typical US preschool, with a curated number of children to caregivers and a mother or a father to pick you up when you are tired and stressed out after 3 or 5 or 6 hours. It was a very emotional for the whole family, especially knowing that not every one of the children you see, will be adopted.

Eli noticed, the children don't own anything. No toy is theirs, no thing is theirs, just their name, and their person. What a difference, a childhood.

More families are needed, not less. Children deserve homes.

Saying goodbye is impossible. I hope she flies home to us, home to us soon.


(37 hours later, after our lovely layover in Dubai, we returned back home. Ethiopia is very far away, but it is very much in our hearts.)


More details about missing days as I can write them....

1 comment:

Miriam Eusebio said...

That photo at the top is so wonderful! I'm so happy for you that you all will have this lovely baby in your lives soon!